Changing Parenting Style

With my first son Tyler, I wrapped him completely in cotton wool, and then in bubble wrap, and then a quilt.....you get the picture. As a first time parent I had no clue. I was overprotective and a little bit crazy. Every little thing panicked me. Don't get me wrong everything still worries me but I just handle it in a different way now.
After having three children my parenting style has really changed. I know what really matters and what to brush off. With Tyler I didn't like him to get too messy and I taught him to be gentle and kind and never let him play boisterously. He is such a sweet sensitive soul because of it. However, when we went to playgroups I would intervene if a disagreement happened over a toy or if someone was pushing and shoving I would move him away from the equation. As a result, along with being so kind and caring he also didn't know how to stick up for himself as his mama was always so fiercely protective. Jaxon being number 3 it is a whole different ball game for me and I really noticed it when I took him to his first playgroup last week. These little arguments over toys need to happen, they need to be questioned and they need not always have their own way. I know now that this isn't just one child being mean, or naughty but it is them learning how to communicate and be patient. The same with tantrums, I would avoid them at all costs with Tyler and do anything to distract him, but if distraction doesn't work for Jaxon and he really just wants to shout it out, I let him. Imagine being a child and your whole world was that packet of chocolate buttons that you weren't allowed to eat. They just don't understand, and its all a learning process. I just let him thrash it out and then give him a cuddle. It was a funny feeling watching certain things going on in that playgroup, when I know 8 years ago with Tyler I would have been so upset and annoyed by them. I'm not saying that I sit there and let Jaxon take other children's toys or let other children whack him with trains and lego blocks but these days I am much more relaxed about everything. These little Toddler groups are a place for our little monsters to grow, learn and become sociable. Last week Jaxon learned to wait his turn for the slide.....I wonder what he will learn next time!?

Mrs H x

No evidence of Mummy.

How is it that as parents we have hundreds of photographs of our children and hardly any that include us mums? I take photographs daily,on my phone, so you can imagine how many photographs I have in total. Even if i took only one photo day, thats 365 pictures in the year. Thats without days out and special occasions where we all get snap happy! Of course these snaps are our precious memories caught on paper. There forever for us to look back on, and how amazing is it that we have the technology to take these photos and share with the world at the click of a button! What I dont have is pictures of me, as a mother, plenty of selfies, but not in my natural role. Why is it that us Mums are always in the background? We are like the foundations of a building, holding it all together but not seen. I'm making it my challenge to have more photos taken with me in. Of course I am usually always the one taking them, but I dont want my children to grow up and not have their childhood captured with me in it! So what my hair needs a wash, so what I'm carrying all that extra weight, so what I'm not wearing any make up. The next time we have a family day out I will ask that person behind me to take a family photo, and the next time someone takes a natural shot of me I wont ask for it to be deleted because of my make up free face. From here on I am going to embrace the camera and capture even more memories of my children AND their mummy.